I'M JUST SO PRETTY

In class on Monday, Dr. Johnson discussed how making someone apologize to you is not the same thing as them apologizing of their own free will. She said it was similar to having someone tell you that you “look good”.

I looked at Rachel. This is something I do. All the time. Whenever, I see her, I ask her if I look good and more importantly make her reassure me. I thought it was interesting to look at it as a forced recognition. I’m using our friendship as leverage to make her say that I look good. 

By doing this I’m not getting the recognition I want. It’s not the same thing as having a stranger tell me I look good. That was given freely to me. They have no reason to go out of their way to tell me that. That gives me more of the reassurance.

I also thought about if from who I ask this question. I ask Rachel, because we’re friends. But, I never in my life asked a male friend to tell me I look good. There’s a different power differential there. I’m thankful if they notice that I color coordinated.

I suppose I don’t need to ask anyone. My beauty is a constant. Especially, considering all the moisturizer and sunscreen I use. It’s a non-transcendental fact.